September 2008

update today

I'm sure it sounds lame but I'm not doing the burka today.
Here's the story. I got dressed up. All exotic. Like the last time, really. I was doing the thing, playing harem girl, you know? I set up the tripod, got the camera set up, set the camera on portrait, and it told me my battery was empty and it turned itself off. We lost the spare on our trip, so that was that. Well fine I'll get a pic later. I went in all fancy schmancy and feeling friendly and magnanimous decided to offer the birds treats for being good about being locked up. First Petey. He steps on my finger, then latches onto my thumb with a force unknown before. He's NEVER bitten me this hard! Not that I remember, not even when he was new! He's seen me painted and hung with jewellery, and I'm holding the treat jar, so I really don't get it. He flew off and I batted at him in the air, furious and upset. He landed on his cage, I put away the treat jar and looked angry and offered my hand again. He usually is sorry by then and/or doesn't want to upset me further, or maybe has made his point, I dunno, but at this point he always steps up and gets in his cage, no further trouble. He got his bite in, you know? Not today. Today he starts grinding on my thumb like he's a meat eater, the old dinosaur ancestry kicking in and flesh is being removed. I get him in his cage and try to scrape him off on a perch but he isn't letting go. Just chewing that chunk of flesh painfully off my hand. I finally get him off with my other hand but the damage, pain, and hurt feelings are done. I'm upset now. I'm crying, feeling betrayed by someone I've grown to trust and love. I go change into ordinary clothes and jewellery and wipe down the makeup. I can't find the internal balance I need to face the weirdness of today's plan. Not anymore. Maybe another woman would suck it up and get back to center but that's not me. I just don't handle stress that well. I never did figure out how. I hope eventually I'll learn to be calmer inside but today I'm not.
Ironically, if it weren't for the weirdness of it, the total covering offered by a burka would be a comfort on a day like this. I'd love to hide inside folds of gaily colored cloth. If another person were along to help protect me from possible verbal attacks (or?) then that would work too. But I've been bullied. I know how nasty people can be. I know I could face such cruelty in my weird costume. I need to have a strong mind set when I do this if I have to do it alone. Besides, crying really messes up the makeup. Sorry folks, not happening today. But then, even fits and starts like this give some insight, right?
Why would I percieve it so dangerous to go out in a religious outfit like this? It's not the moslems I fear. I don't fear that they'd be upset about me wearing something from their culture, or maybe wearing it wrong or something. I fear my own society's treatment of extreme moslem practices! How sad is that? Canada likes to think of herself as tolerant but deep down I think we all know we're not as tolerant as we pretend.

inspiration

This news article: has me thinking again about the burkha and my lack of courage regarding that. I've had lots of excuses not to do it. One that I haven't communicated with the woman who offered to video document this. Another that I've not been driving the car and that's pretty much the most realistic way to do this, oh you know, just excuses for things and not being the right day. Well today could be right. I have car errands to run including a trip to the store. Perfect for the job, right? Maybe also a walk in the mall to just see what happens. Is it disrespectful to moslems? Sympathetic? I don't know. I don't know any moslems to ask and none have turned up to comment. So how can I know? I'll let you know tonight if I've done it. If you don't see an update, I didn't.

Ow, I'm such a bonehead!

So today we're taking a scooter course to improve our abilities and learn safety techniques. We've all signed a waiver, we know we might go down. But not me, oh no. I'm never gonna scratch my pretty new baby, no way! Well...
I didn't screw up on a manoeuver to go down. No, not me. Nothing so mundane.
Instead, it was late morning, I'd been up since 5am and I was definitely tired. The exercises had been hard, I had too many things going on to think about and yet another correction every time from someone telling me what to do or not do (mostly the instructor but sometimes my husband who thinks he's helpful). I was fucking up on this one. It's the Teardrop exercise. He told us the cops do it faster and faster up to 42 sec. So you go through the "gate" (everything's pylons) and fast across to the other pylon, brake with rear first, then front, (but we hadn't learned proper speed braking yet) then round it, fast across, round the next. Okay? I'm getting frustrated, can't quite make the turns, get mad and leave to go round the parking lot.
Ok, settle down, try it again, Yo, you must learn this. Second time. Fucked up again. Again I race off around the corner in anger. Third time I'm crying before I even get into the gate. I fuck it up, get really pissed and race down the lot and pull a FAST straightline stop. Only it's not a bicycle. Weight dynamics are different and I stop too hard and wind up locking the front before it's ready and locking the back and squealing, and sliding about 1.5m. Tore up my gloves which were NOT the ones I should have been using. they're my expensive leather dress gloves when I do have less wonderful leather gloves. Not properly cycling gloves though. Ouch on the hand. Dinged my elbow. Not bad, and leather jacket handled it brilliantly. Tore out a light It works and popped back but it's broken). filthed my jeans and bashed my knee painfully. Knee, ankle, and wrist are all ouch. Helmet whacked down so it needs replacing. Boots dented and scuffed. Front fender well rashed on my pretty red bike. Exhaust shield chrome all scuffed.
~sigh~ I can claim it and possibly get it all fixed without loss of points but not sure yet. It depends on cost of repair really. I'll research the matter tomorrow, see if my supplemental covers it, how much it would cost, can I get a for-real motorbike jacket and a decent helmet, etc.
I did pick up my own bike. I did get back on and finish the day. I do hurt.
I'm ashamed of losing my temper and stunting. Glad it fucked up so I didn't think I did good. Glad I laid it down so I know what it's like. Glad the damage was minor. Mostly, I'm proud I got back on and finished the day. Yes I cried a fair bit. ~shrug~ that's not unusual for me!

funny news story

I don't know if this is real or not but it's hilarious.
Vagina a myth say Saudi scientists
RIYADH. The so-called 'vagina' is a myth, and women should stop trying to claim that they enjoy sex, says a group of Saudi grand viziers.
The viziers, all experts in modern Saudi scientific fields such as astrology, water divination and alchemy, were speaking at the launch of their new study, 'Between the Cracks: Stop Fannying About With Our Women', which has set out to prove that the 'vagina' is nothing more than an extension of the buttocks.
"Everybody knows that women are non-sexual creatures," said team leader Prince Abdul Abdul Abdul. "This fantasy about a female sexual organ, this subversive and frankly repulsive idea of a 'vagina', is yet another assault on our values and customs by the West."
Senior researcher Abdul Saud agreed. "Ask any man in the Kingdom if his wife has ever showed the slightest bit of enjoyment while fulfilling the nasty but essential work of spawning a male heir, and he will tell you that sex for women is, and always has been, utterly joyless."
"Until now, we naturally assumed that this lack of pleasure was the fault of the woman partner, perhaps due to some inherent psychological handicap shared by all women," said Grand Vizier of Numerology, Professor Faisal Abdul Saud. "But now we have shown that women are not only stunted psychologically, but physically too."
The team admitted that they had not questioned any actual women during the course of their research, since this would have required having a conversation with one, which is frowned upon in the Saudi scientific community.
Asked if they had ever heard of the clitoris, they confirmed that they had.
"Clitoris was a common name for girl-children in the mid-Victorian era," said Prof. Saud, adding that it sounded quaint and "faintly reminiscent of flowers".
These guys aren't allowed to speak to women, look at them, examine them, or otherwise have anything to do with them, yet have made reports about women? Were they even allowed to read about them? I am so puzzled by religions that encourage followers to hate. To hate themselves or members of their community. To shun and avoid each other. I can understand it from a control point of view, of leaders making this nonsense up in order to control the followers, but is that what's going on even now in Muslim society, or is it the heritage of a previous dictatorial system still being followed today? It's just so unfortunate for entire cultures to still have such values. Wherein they encourage things like self mutilation or flagellation, beating as control tools, and hatred of entire subsets, like gender or age.
Addendum: Yes, it's a joke news article. http://www.hayibo.com/

ugly returns

I don't qualify as a fashion commentator but being female and having eyes, I'm exposed to it anyway. Guess what's back? The fugliest decade fashion ever suffered. WHY???? They came around in the 80s doing a retro of the 40s look but with differences. They copied the sillouette and components of the 40s but of course women being more liberated meant that they were less conservative. Albeit still quite conservative compared to the bohemian 70s (where they copied the 20s, I remember).
So they're bringing back the 80s. Seriously! They're not admitting it outright too much but they are. Complete with the economic death in the US! Oh My Ghod. The HORROR! I survived with a combination of punk and 70s retro, but I never thought I'd have to go through it all again. My foolish mind really honestly thought everyone realized the foolishness of their fashion errors and understood finally how god awful ugly those clothes were. The skinny stirrup pants. The stupid giant silk bows on foofy business blouses, the clumsy giant jewellery pieces, the manly sillouette with broad shoulders and narrow hips. ~sob~ All back. All of it. Covered up like muslims with ridiculous giant accessories and scrawny little pegs for legs.
Is it something to do with economics? Does a shitty economy make people want to hide being ridiculous oversized clothes yet remain somber (vs more enjoyable clown wear?) Are the fashion designers just feeling sadistic again? Why are the media in collusion with this travesty? Why do the news commentators smile so nice, don the crap and find complimentary words for what is so horribly unflattering to femininity?
More to the point, how will I survive another decade of ugly views? Oh as to looking hip, no problem, I hahappen to have saved the clothing bits I did like from the 80s (and the 70s and 60s too) so I will have no problem "updating my wardrobe" by just dusting off some old crap. Hell, I still have freaking legwarmers! Then again I could wear the burka and hide in there till fashion finds it's sanity again. LOL

Update on burka arrives

I just can't resist playing dressup. It started with a "little" makeup. I put it on dark and heavy like those arabian beauties in fables, and like you see when you get a glimpse of the typical middle eastern woman beneath her burka. Yeah, I know they don't all paint up like that, but it's not considered harloty to paint and bejewel the woman beneath the cover. I wouldn't be surprised if it's part of the culture in a way of saying "we're hiding something beautiful because you're not privileged to see it" rather than "I'm hiding because I'm ugly." So I painted, then I bejewelled, then selected some lovely clothes that would go with a burka. I've a Bedoin headdress if coins and a coin belt, jingly earrings and bracelet too. Just to add to the allure of "what's under there?" My skirt is floor-length batik in purple with white and salmon accents, my shirt embroidered tye-dye from India. It's all delightfully ethnic. Like I say, I can't resist costuming. I even did my nails up in a nice rich magenta. Some black stockings complete the ensemble. I haven't figured out what for sweater or coat, or shoes, it's not that warm out, yet not that cold, and I don't know yet. Then I put on the burka over it all. Vision is too crappy to take it grocery shopping today but maybe to the mall one day would work. Oh how I wish I had some feminine support. A group of burka clad women would be so much safer. Even one friend to come along in a burka. But that is not to be. I have few friends and nobody I feel comfortable asking for anything, much less this. Heck, I don't really even talk to anyone locally much anymore. I don't really even know how anymore. But that's the Asperger's I guess. That's for another day to discuss if I want to whine or dis myself or .. whatever.
So I put the burka over it all. Very mysterious and exotic. Frankly I think it's beautiful. When I put it over my head to reveal my face, like they do when they are in a group of women there, I saw my face wrapped in this exotic wear, peering out from folds of fabric, eyes dark shadowed and dramatic, and I felt more beautiful than I have since I was a young woman. I saw a beauty there. More so than when I'm out there loud and bright with my long pink hair and all. I've always thought my face looked best draped in scarves or such, like some exotic from the middle east. If there was someone here to take a pic I'd post it, but alas, there isn't. I'm just too lazy to set up a tripod and time delay for you either. Dan will just laugh at me and anyway he's working late.
So I am going to dress up a bit for my errands today, leave the jingly weird jewellery on, and wrap up a bit in wool, but not the hot pink burka, not for grocery shopping. It's just too hard to see out that thing! Nevermind trying to work around the folds of cloth. I don't have the benefit of sisters to help me learn nor years of experience living in drapery.

Burka arrives

I really never am sure how to spell it, it's got so many variant spellings! Well it arrived in the mail today. It's a lovely color. The fabric and sewing are as cheap as it's price but hey, the women in Afghanistan are pretty poor. I expect it's a very ordinary typical example. I tried it on. I noticed cool air flows in the face vents nicely. It looked exactly like any other. I brought it up over my head but without the practiced grace of the women who live in these. I tucked the folds around my chin. I noted that the clothing underneath was too much at odds with the look. I'll have to adopt a long skirt and such to go with it if I choose to go out like this. I could sense the shyness it enables. You can hide. You can tuck yourself in to whatever level of hiding suits you best and let only as much of you show as you're comfortable sharing.
I won't be using it today although I do need to go out and do things. As tempting as it is, I am not sure I have the necessary calm today to face something this potentially stressful. I mean, if people leave me alone about it, sure, it could actually be good on a stressful day, but I don't know how it will go and I want to be feeling brave and strong when I try it out the first time.
What happened today was a bad dream that started my day off wrong. I woke up early but with the alarm set to go off very soon. Not the alarm to which I get up, the "first" ring. I set the alarm for half an hour before up-getting time and hit the snooze button three times. Well if it went off at that point I'd be startled further awake when I felt such a strong need to sleep just a little more. I felt like I hadn't had any decent dream time since getting up to pee a couple hours earlier. So I turned the alarm right off. A chance I'd oversleep, sure, but I just really wanted that dream time. Big mistake. I dreamt alright, and overslept. The dream was incredibly stressful. Some reliving of the less supportive periods of my youth, rehashed in a new scene about which I recall very little. I just remember having too many things loaded onto me. Chores and tasks, appointments and meetings, all laid on me without any regard for chill time or scheduling at all. All of it top priority, must do, far more than can be done in time. I woke up with that groggy feeling of oversleep coupled with a sense of overwhelming and panic. What's more, because I slept late I couldn't even have my little chill time before the pets started to agitate for their morning to begin!
I wound up yelling at everyone at some point, just too uptight even to let my parrot sit on me. (why does my dog seem to have been sprinkled with carpet fresh when we don't use the stuff? She still stinks, needs a bath...) So I've finally had food and I'm having tea. Hot caffiene does help me relax, honestly. I'm still not sure now I have this burka, what I'll do with it. Wear it out? Save it for Hallowe'en? Wear it around the house? Cover a lamp for mood lighting? Well for today I'm doing exactly nothing with it. It hangs on a chair and I'll probably move it to a hanger. I've got other things to do today.

common decency

Saskatoon city police are struggling to make sense of a stabbing Sunday that sent a 12-year-old girl to hospital with a chest wound. The suspects, three males and one female, are all believed to be 12 to 13 years old as well. “It’s very alarming because it tells us two things: Young people are out there not only armed with weapons but willing to commit serious crimes with them,” said police spokesperson Const. Carolyn Wensley. The incident occurred around 9:30 p.m. in the area of the 300 block of Avenue H South. Preliminary investigations indicate it may have been an attempted robbery, said Wensley, noting the girl’s injuries are not believed to be life-threatening. “We know people as young as this have stolen vehicles so we’re not naive to think they don’t commit crimes. But in the end, that is still a property crime,” said Wensley. “To willingly and knowingly harm another individual is taking it to another level. “It’s hard for me to understand why a 12-year-old would harm another 12year-old like that.” It’s difficult to identify the reason a young person would resort to such violence but it’s easy to place blame on parents, gangs, drugs or alcohol abuse and desensitivity through images in movies and video games, said Wensley. A justice system that gives youths a few chances before laying down harsher sentences could also be blamed, said Wensley. “All those factors combined makes for some pretty sketchy situations,” she said, adding somewhere along the path their lives have taken, the suspects lost their sense of “common human decency.” “They have become empowered with a feeling there’s nothing wrong with hurting a person.” The hope is that people in the community, those who may have witnessed the event, “feel enraged enough to come forward and put a stop to it,” said Wensley.

They speak of children losing their sense of common human decency. They say children are empowered with these psychopathic tendencies. But guys, children aren't necessarily born with any empathy or common sense or common decency. We teach it to them. Children may discover it on their own but generally it is taught to them by parents, peers, teachers, and our cultural hand-downs in songs, stories, and so on. A baby thinks nothing of throwing hard objects at his mother when she won't let him do as he pleases. He learns from her that it hurts and that hurting others isn't in his best interest. He learns to care about others because they care about him and because a caring world serves him better. He learns to put himself in a broader context of community by seeing how it works to benefit him and others, and that he sometimes has to give if he wishes to continue getting. Children left to run wild in an urban setting for generation after generation are much less likely to recieve these lessons. Add into that equation a powerful dose of abuse from family and society in general, plus a culture of disrespect both to and from the child's identity group, and he has no reason to believe that he'll get out of it what he puts into it. Rather he will think that he must do anything in his power to acquire what he desires for himself, and the only restraints will be from fear of negative consequences. Currently those consequences come only from the justice system and this system is too crippled to provide appropriate punishment and education to a delinquent child. Far too few are apprehended in the first place, and when apprehended they are generally back to their stomping grounds before nightfall with nothing more in the future but annoying boring court appointments where strangers drone at them awhile, possibly followed by a few days in a boarding school seeing some of their buddies and learning from older children how to improve their criminal career.
So what would I do? I'd start with mandatory 12month birth control shots for all women seeking welfare. Stop the problem at the source. The only way around it is either to not recieve welfare, or to have a doctor certify sterility or that the medication would endanger her health. This might even be applied to daughters on welfare from the time they beghin their menses although I'm not sure that is wise. Sadly most of these mothers are under the age of 16 and living with a parent when they begin to whelp brats.
Another approach might be mandatory family counselling for all families on welfare. Certainly I assure you that tying the solution to the receipt of the monthly cheque will bring results if we can find a solution that will actually bring better parenting to the poor neighborhoods. For the older kids already ruined, we need stronger laws. We need more onerous punishment. I'd love to advocate whipping but that would bring us all lower as a society. Some manner of forced work would probably do the child a lot more good. Coupled with removal from his home community for the duration of his sentence. Send him somewhere that he may see things from another perspective, and put him into a community under supervised conditions where he's kept busy doing something useful and valuable and learning new skills. Create a system of rewards and privileges to encourage his co-operation. Like if he wants his cola, chocolate, or smokes, he has to comply with the demands placed on him.
Certainly what isn't working is releasing these children back into their parents care over and over.

Burqa experiment start...

Last night I bought a burqa. I haven't told my husband. I'm not sure how he'll take it but I suspect he won't understand and will think it's just a dumb idea. For years I've been seeing these Afghan women in their flowing fabric sacks. Lovely embroidery on monotone fabrics with pleats in the back and a panel to peer through in front all sewn to a cap on top. One simple unit. It easily throws up over the head to be a shawl or cape style garment or pulls down for complete coverage. They look so anonymous in these all the different colors like flowers.
The burqa is a very controversial issue. Making women wear them on pain of death or even just terror and pain, or for that matter even fining them is reprehensible to me. You should never force people to conform to anyone's set of morals in things like dress, modesty, sexual freedom, choice of career, lifestyle, or love partners. Diversity is strength, conformity breeds weakness and disease. I stifles a person. However, by the same token, if women feel more comfortable covered up, as they might in a patriarchal society that regards them as walking sex receptacles, they should have the option to cover up as much as they need!
I recall years ago being at a friend's house when another friend of ours showed up drunk. He was drunk but not disabled and he was in a fighting mood as usual. He began to rant at me about how I was trying to seduce every man on earth. How all women spent their time using seduction to control and manipulate men. He went on at length, repeating himself both in repeated phrases and rephrases. I gradually started covering myself with a blanket. At first because I was cold, then because I noticed he would get on another subject for awhile and stay on it longer the more I covered up. The less of me he could see, the less he ranted. He finally ceased altogether when I had the blanket covering even my face. It was extremely surreal. My friend finally ushered him out the door.
Sometimes in winter when it's very cold I am wrapped up to the eyes or even with a piece of scarf over my eyes, peering through the loose wool weave. When I'm thus dressed I think of islamic women and their coverings. I wonder if this is how they feel, safely protected, anonymous, free to act and work and be without hassle from men. Men sexually harass pretty women even in modern advanced societies. They see it as expressing interest and desire, as being complimentary. It is, yet it is also not. It pressures us. It says "hey, notice me or I'll get louder." It requires a woman to either become a sex object or become a bitch by refusing. When we're covered up from head to toe we become one faceless female unit, neither pretty nor ugly, just the person inside and the words she says and the thoughts she has. Or so I think, perhaps. I don't know, really, because winter cover is removed as soon as you get inside.
So I wonder, in a burqa which is always on around strangers would these effects occur? Could this be why women wear them even when they aren't required, or is social pressure and religious pressure just that great?
Then there's another set of questions, ones more relevant to a Canadian woman in Saskatchewan. That is how would people around here deal with a woman in a full Afghan burqa? Not even her eyes visible? Oh how I itch to try that extreme social experiment? To walk about the city running my errands and doing my business, clad in a full burqa, only toes and fingers to be seen!
So this has been on my mind. Last night I woke up in the middle of the night enjoying one of those middle aged experiences to which we women are subject, hot in a freezing room, and wide awake in the middle of the night. Nothing to be done but sit up a while till it passes. I was reading the paper and saw a picture of a room full of women in burqas. Again the crazy idea surfaced. "Gee," I thought to myself "I wonder if they're available to buy in Canada and how much would they cost?" I started searching the web. Mostly I saw scarves and complicated instructions for their assembly into a wrap that leaves the face free. I also saw peculiar layered masks that tie on over or under said scarves. There were some types of scarves built as single pull-on units like a winter balaclava with open face. However nobody seemed to sell that lovely flowing garment the afgan women wear. It looks very simple, just put it on like a bag and go, no tying of this and pinning of that. Further, very few of the solutions I saw covered the eyes and those few which did, face masks and veils, were black.
Finally as I was getting ready to give up I found one. Zarinas.com  where they sell a variety of Afghan clothing and jewellery imports. They do have some lovely things. Their belly dancer accessories just made me long for the body of my youth, all slim and supple and covered over with things that jingle and hide and reveal. I imagined myself dressed like that, all sexy and hot, but then covered mysteriously in the full figure burqa. Oh how very romantic and exotic that would be! Then I found them. Exactly like those in the pictures and movies I've seen! They come in a variety of pretty colors too. I deliberated a bit, imagining a crew of women flowing down the street in these bright colors like a field of flowers. Then I realized it would just be me. I should pick the happiest color there. That meant blue, green, or hot pink. Well duh, of course it's hot pink, lets face it, I LOVE that color! What's more, it will play with people's heads better to wear a color so gay and bright on a symbol of such extreme repression.
I expect the majority of people, if not everyone, will immediately have a gut reaction to this garment. They'll want me to take it off, they'll want to rescue me, perhaps think I'm passing judgment on less modest women? Yet our Canadian social values will forbid them from outright expression of these negative reactions. They'll surely squirm. Hey, I make people squirm all the time even when I'm trying not to, so why not do it deliberately as a social experiment? It's FASCINATING!
What if I like it? What if I enjoy the coverage? What if I find it liberating to be hidden, comforting and secure, safe and quiet? No longer afraid of rape from lascivious men? I know I felt that much when I was fat. As a young woman I was always walking next to my fear. Always on my mind, the fear that one day some man might call my tough bluff and actually assault me. As a middle aged woman I fear much less but since I dropped the extra fat I know I'm attractive enough and I get hit on again, so the fear is not wholly gone. Men get such powerful sexual impulses that many of them don't comprehend controlling, nor desire to control themselves. They can be quite beastly. What's more, they forget that there's a person worthy of compassion within their target desire. That sexy body holds a person who is just as valid as you, just as vulnerable, as small and caring, just as deep and feeling, just as mart and aware of herself as any man. She is more than her hips and breasts. Yet so many men stop thinking at the figure, forgetting all that as the natural urge to mate sweeps through them. So it prompts for modesty. Both from the men who tire of fighting sexual urges constantly, and from the women who tire of meeting beasts where there should be people. Cover up the body, and the ranting stops, the people connect, and dialog is engaged.
Personally I think we should raise our men from childhood to exercise enough self discipline and restraint that it isn't an issue for them or the women in their lives. However, the reality is that we don't and in many ways, we're losing ground rapidly on the issues of self control and personal restraint. We are gaining on women's rights, but these may be eroded if each successive generation learns more and more instant gratification of urges.
So last night I selected the hot pink burqa and clicked thorugh the buy page. I bought it. I haven't told my husband but I know now I'll tell him to read this blog post, hoping he gets it, and that he has the courage to embrace this peculiar experiment. I shall document my burqa experience here, how it feels to recieve it, what it's like to wear it, whether I find the courage to go out in it or not. I can say I'll be forced to walk, ride the bus, or take a taxi, because I can't drive without lifting it off my face, and my bicycle is too recognizeable and I'm not sure I'm ready for acquaintances to know I'm doing this. I'd far rather let people think I'm really muslim because then they're less likely to try and force me to unveil myself for their personal comfort. If people know i"m not bound by religion to wear it, they simply won't put up with it I'm sure. It's just too offensive to hide your face in our culture! I won't ask my husband to come along on these burqa outings, he might take too much flack or at least too many dirty looks for oppressing me so horribly. In Afganistan, of course, I would be foridden to go out alone without a safe male companion (brother, father, uncle, husband) but I really don't have anyone to play that role except a husband who is just not into street theatrics.